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i can see myself heading straight for failure. i can only succeed when someone tells me something that i should do, its just a pattern if noticed. i cant rely on myself to know what im doing or why im doing it. when i get told what to do, i feel that that person knows whats best for me. even if they dont. i tried to "eat healthy" which only turned into a hog fest. i almost havent stopped eating when im at home and i cant imagine im anything less than 152 at this point. 7 pounds more than 145, where i was only 2 weeks ago. help me get back there. so heres my proposal: should i do a week long-liquid clense, try to eat around 500 calories, less than 500 calories, or simply eat healthy, say between 1000-1200 calories? also, what regimine for excersize should i do: 4 days running, everyday run, everyday to core workouts, only 5 days? give me something to do. im begging you. | | |
|  this girl is my version of perfect. i want to be her.
i weighed myself this morning and i was one hundred and fucking fifty pounds. im not going to weigh myself until i get weighed at the doctors so the digits 1-5-0 stick to my brain. i found out my body carrying the weight it does burns 1878 calories a day by itself. after some time of math, i found if i stick to 2100 calories per week and burning 600 calories a day, i should lose 5 pounds a week. im making a countdown of 3 weeks because at the end, im going to this music festival where i used to live and all of my old friends will see me and i havent seen them in 3 years! and i want them to believe i should be a model.it always motivates me to see time is moving by, with or without me, so im going to have the days until the music fest in a countdown on my wall.
in seventeen's latest magazine, they have an ab workout, so im going to do 25 repititions 6 days a week of the 5 excersizes
oatmeal 60 chips 45 cereal 80 ceram 40 carrots 70 crackers 30 whipped cream 40 in: 365 90 crunches 32 squats 10 push ups (-20) an hour running -500 out: -520
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i feel bad i havent been on in a while. ive changed my plans again and im pretty confident in this one. im shooting for 1000 calories or less now. ive been feeling alot happier, as my restricting made me feel to controlled by worrying. i just hope ill start losing instead of gaining. my doctors appointment is on wednesday. i have no idea how im going to make it through. i hope im at 145 by then and now im at 147.5 talk to me, how have you ladies been? | | |
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my fast went from 6 pm yesterday to 5 today. i made rice crsipys for a school thing, and i had a little. with alot of calories. the rice crispys had, say, 200 calories, but i ate m&ms too, so another 300. i dont mind breaking my fast though. i just decided id do 4 one day fasts with about 300 calories in between. rejecting food isnt hard, its just controlling how much when i do eat. total: 500 i also said i was going to start running. which i did. yesterday i ran 2.6 miles burning about 330 calories. and today i ran 2.9, which burned 390. outtake: 390 my second fast began at 6 30, so its been an hour now. total: 110 ive become obsessed with the song time of the season by ben taylor. everytime i hear it, i think of me and a guy together, being against eachother and my hipbones jutting out against his. so great thinspo. it was in the movie Prom Night, so itll probably ring a bell when you hear it, but i suggest heading to youtube straight away. ive decided that once i get my liscence, im going to get a motorcycle liscense. not a heavy duty, threatening chopper, just a cute but hardcore bike. like so:
 im going to try to do this diet where its a week and your supposed to lose 10 pounds in a week. i dont care about the standards or even if ill actually lose 10. all im hoping for is at least 5 to get me motivated. thanks to all you supporting girls. its means soo much. how are you doing? | | |
| with a fresh start deserves a fresh appearance. =new laout. new eating habits. new running obsession. i will never be a size 8 again. ever. alright. well my doctors appointment is on the 1st instead of 6th, so im going to have to cut back my goal just a little. i got started on losing weight so well, and i need to get back to it. i feel confident right now that i have this. not going to have goals, but hopes and standards. standard: run 5 times a week, at least 2 pounds per week. i dont care how sickly i start to feel, im fasting for as long as i can. at least 4 days starting at 6 pm today. | | |
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